Confessions of a Dangerous Blogger:

[audio:blackhawkdown.mp3]

My darling one, my shining light,
I have neither paper nor ink to write,
I speak this message through gritted teeth,
Mere breath to shed my last belief.
My footsteps tread the months from you,
Each longing step a pang anew,
The world that enveloped you and I,
Memories tainting the dying light.
Wooden stares the trees they sway,
The birds don’t come just fly away,
Who we are who we might have been,
How life might end or death might seem.
I found no answers I didn’t know,
I took no journey that enriched me so,
All that has passed, all I gave,
Lies open in a dirty grave.
Captors, men surrounding me,
Cut me as I fall asleep,
Darkened frames of hate-filled eyes,
Visitations from pain’s reprise.
The light is gone, I face the pain,
To never see your face again,
Dragged along by heavy feet,
My journey to eternal sleep,
A drum beats softly within my heart,
All I have with which to part,
All I wanted but could not do,
To take my body back to you,
So here I die, this foreign land,
Star-filled sky, world of sand,
My darling one, remember me,
The love we shared will always be,
Though fate may take our love away,
It shall be joined again some day.

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(Read at the wedding of Keith and Cheryl Ko)

You struck me with your shining hair,
A look as I was standing there,
You looked at me with eyes that were so kind.

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I slipped away in the cool of night
Away from all the light so bright
Shimmy down stairs climb down there
You lay dead and I just don’t care

I’m away
I’m away
I don’t stay
I don’t stay
I am gray
I am gray
You will pay
You will pay

Life flushed from your eyes so fast
Delicate existence couldn’t last
Lollipop candy taste so sweet
Second in line to human meat

Run away
Run away
Every day
Every day
In my way
In my way
I will slay
I will slay

Shadow helps no man to see
Fears will rush to swallow thee
Lightning stikes the helpless tree
Say your prayers and wait for me

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I sit here thinking back now,
Over all the years gone past,
Counting up the minutes,
That flew by way too fast.

Brother I feel I failed you,
Let you face the world alone,
Never found enough time beside you,
Never called you on the phone.

I don’t know what you’re thinking,
Only what I hoped you’d be,
Fragments of memories linking,
The past to who I see.

Maybe it was all you wanted,
To have me by your side,
When I was oh so busy,
Wrapped up in my life.
I know that a clock is ticking,
Running down the day,
And I feel lost and sinking,
A thousand miles away.

There will never be a day goes past,
When I will not think of you,
For you were the brother I wished for,
And wishing made it true.

I wanted you to know this,
Though I am far away,
A feeling never falters,
I’m so proud every day.

You’re never alone in this world,
I’d give you my last breath,
Nothing can ever change it,
My brother, not even death.

Maybe it was all you wanted,
To have me by your side,
When I was oh so busy,
Wrapped up in my life,
Maybe the clock is ticking,
Running down our days,
But if you’re lost and sinking,
Please don’t run away.

Maybe it’s too late now,
To stand there by your side,
Cos you grew up and I,
Was wrapped up in my life,
And still that clock is ticking,
The days are going still,
I want it to turn back now,
But I know it never will.

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I thought it was chance to meet you
When I was feeling kinda blue
You didn’t want the bother
It felt too good to be true
You countered my imbalance
I filled a sullen void
And all along I didn’t care
If I was just your toy

I wasn’t looking for a good thing
You were looking for some fun
But a good thing came and found us
And our thing came undone

Too good to be true
What am I to you?
Too pure to screw it
This will never do
Ashes in the darkness
Run against the flow
Call me when you want me
You say before you go

It’s a modest understanding,
The accidental fling,
When need becomes a triumph
Of petty little things
We circle one another,
A testing sweet embrace
But journeys end alone
And somehow out of place

Too good to be true,
What am I to you?
Too caught up to notice
That nice will never do
Cigarettes in the darkness,
Bodies everywhere
Put aside the feeling,
Put aside the care.

Too much left to do,
One and one make two,
But if if they never add right,
Then what am I to do?
Haunting scents in passing,
Quick to say goodbye,
Weeks go by and then some,
Strangers you and I…

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