It may be my mind maturing, or it may be that I watched one too many episodes of Life, but I came to an important discovery, oh a few hours ago. I won’t take too much of your time in telling you what that is, I promise.
Firstly though, I’d like to note that it’s very sad Heath Ledger passed away. I was really starting to enjoy his work. The last movie I saw with him in it was I’m Not There where he played an incarnation of Bob Dylan and did a bang-up job. It’s such a shame to lose an actor who definitely had his best work ahead of him.
Which brings me to my point. No wait, it doesn’t. Not yet.
Over the past weeks, I’ve been stressing about something. I thought this thing was mine, so I was obsessed with being sure that it was. I would lose sleep wondering if it really was, looking for ways it mightn’t and finding possible solutions to make sure it didn’t slip from my grasp. In the end, I realized it wasn’t mine at all and that’s when it became mine for real.
We own nothing truly. We co-occupy space with things. We carry them around with us, bring them into our lives, but actually we don’t really own them. You might say that we do own things according to property law, but if you suggest that I’d suggest you need to roll something, smoke it and think outside the box, man. For law implies enforcement, which is artificial. In nature, everything is transient, including ourselves. We can hold onto things, but they are only with us so long as we keep a tight grip. As soon as we let go (and we must let go at some time) they may very well disappear.
Things will share a space with us. The more we become attached to things, the more we worry about their eventual absence. That kind of feeling is dependent attachment. When we consider one thing an extension of ourselves, we can’t live without it and it feels like losing a finger.
A far more comforting feeling is the knowledge that we are free to enjoy the things around us, but to realize that we don’t really possess them in any real sense. We can enjoy the feelings they give us and we can freely let go in the knowledge that everything comes and goes in life. Sometimes the tide will wash it back to shore and sometimes it will drift out to sea.
When we realize that what we own does not define us and that what we own is just coming along for a part of the ride, then we can not only be comfortable with loss, but we can discover the beauty of who we truly are.
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