Archive for January, 2006

24: Jack is Back!


2006
01.17

Jack Bauer is back! Oh yeah, the guy who immortalized lines like “Tell me where the bomb is!” and “Get down, now!” is back and ready to save the world. If you haven’t seen 24, then you haven’t watched television. You have seen something which resembles television, but not anything like the television you see when Jack is running around blasting people, jumping off things and getting answers out of hardened terrorists. And for all the bad guys in this fifth season, Jack will only ask you once, then he’ll shoot you. So you’d better tell him what he wants to know.

I kid. But not really.

Surprisingly (or not so surprisingly for all you cynics), even after saving the world oh I don’t know FOUR TIMES, Jack has not been instated as President and ruler of the known universe. Why this is not so is essentially like asking “why is there injustice in the world?” I don’t know there just is and it pisses me off. Oh sure, Jack doesn’t go for that sort of thing. Give him a bottle of bourbon and a pat on the back and Jack’s a happy man. But the least they could do is offer him the title of ‘Supreme Commander of the Galaxy’ or something. God knows he deserves it. But instead Jack starts out this season as an ostracized dead man walking, having faked his own death at the end of the previous season to get those Chinese off his back (they were angry about some embassy thing, geez get over it already!). No thanks, no pension, no nothing. So he’s doing hard labor under a false name, lying low and staying out of trouble. Of course you know that he’s the best damn hard laborer out there, but you have to beat your fists against the nearest CTU mole (there’s quite a few of them around) to vent your frustration.

I can’t wait to watch it. I just finished downloading the first four episodes and when my pizza gets here I’m leaping in. Here comes 24 hours of thrills, spills and more plot twists than you can inject a truth serum in. Jack is back!

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The Korea I Know (Part One)


2006
01.15

I thought it might be interesting and possibly even valuable to write an essay about Korea. There are a whole bunch of things that people just don’t know when they first come here and so many questions that they ask, from ‘Is it safe?’ to ‘Can I buy clothes my size?’ to ‘Where are the good nightclubs?’ and many more. So from time to time I’ll write a little in a blog here and there, and eventually compile it into an article. I could write it all at once, but I haven’t got time to sit down and do that right now.

Coming to Korea is like coming to many other places you haven’t been before: it’s more normal than you thought it would be. All the staple features of a modern country’s landscape are present. Cars, buses, airports, trains, mobile phones. In Korea the only difference is that all of those things are considerably more modern and advanced than in many western countries. Apart from that, things really don’t hit you as being that much different.

And ultimately they’re not.

What is different? Well besides language and appearance, there are slight cultural differences in some aspects and large ones in others. You don’t really get to it until later, so let’s leave it until later in our story shall we?

For those who read this blog (I’m going to assume for the moment someone does), you will have gained a fairly reasonable impression of the place by now. But I have never discussed things in a how-to sense. Let me do that now.

I live in Seoul, which is a large sprawling city. It spreads itself out for about 30 kilometers side-to-side, depending on how far out you want to draw the line, but there are basically some main districts. Firstly, let’s get it straight, the center of town is not Seoul station. It may be central, but there ain’t much there, so put that out of your mind. When I first came here, I thought it might be good to go there and then check out the center of town before heading out of it. Don’t do this.

It’s not really easy to pinpoint the center of this city. There are just little clusters of skyscrapers (none of which are very high) and shopping districts. Let’s see, there’s Gangnam, Myeongdong, Dongdaemun, Jongno, Yongsan, Itaewon (or home as many of us foreigners like to call it), Samsung, Shinchon, Shincheon (just to be confusing) and Yeouido to name a few. Each have their own features and qualities, and there are a dozen smaller other ones, equally as good, scattered all over the place. For example, Gangnam is an up-market area where you’ll find some good clubs and lots of fashionable stores, but a mostly Korean crowd. Shinchon is close to a few universities, has a great range of night and day activities, a huge number of bars, including some good western ones and good dispersal of foreigners here and there. It’s really best to deal with each as they come up as this guide progresses because you’ll surely not going to take it in right now.

The general place to go for comfort and security is Itaewon. I was taken there when I first arrived and it seemed to allow me to ease my transition pretty well. It is probably the only place in Korea where you can look around and see more foreigners than Koreans. You’ll find McDonalds, Starbucks, Burger King, KFC, Outback, Subway, Nike, Reebok. There are stores selling throwback jerseys, leathers, tailor-made suits and the latest in cowboy apparel. Stalls line the street year in-year out selling trashy souvenirs and tidbits. There are bars galore, playing all types of music, even a bar called Woodstock where you can hear a live band (albeit with English teachers jamming), there are a few clubs and nightspots too. Basically, all you are going to need to establish a reasonable feeling of being back home. Itaewon is on the subway, line number six, exit number 2 dropping you right outside the biggest club in the area. If you want to go there and check it out, it’s very easy because it’s quite a small area. It is essentially just built around one street and every subway exit leads to this street. The great thing too is, unlike other places in Korea, you can easily ask for directions should you get lost.

That concludes this day’s chapter. It’s going to be nice to sleep in for a change. To tell you the truth, I’m kinda sleeping now. So much so that I can’t write what I want to without slipping into dream land and leaving a trail of letters across the page. Before I go I will say this though, to correct the record. Those kids I taught last week did eat crayons after all.

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Oh Monday


2006
01.09

6:30am : The alarm went off, but I could’ve sworn that I had just fallen asleep. I didn’t remember falling asleep though, only trying for an hour or so to get there. I managed to sit upright to turn off my alarm and assessed the situation. I was being pulled back to lie down, but I knew that would end in the loss of my job, so I tried to watch a tv show on my computer to jog my thoughts into a coherent state.

7:00am : Feeling a little better I hit the shower and got dressed. It seems that if I can leave at around 7:30-7:40 I’ll make it to my destination by 8:50 which gives me time for a good breakfast. I tried desperately to find some clothes to wear, but being at the end of a cycle there were only a few remaining. Doing my hair with the leg of a chair, I made it out the door a little late, Harry Potter book for the subway, laptop for my lunch hour and lurched off to the bus stop.

8:07am : I got off the bus at the orange line, cutting a good half hour off my journey had I taken the subway near my house. I ran into the station and grabbed a quick roll to help my medicine go down. I’ve had this cold for what seems like a whole month now, it’s almost become part of who I am. But I’d rather it wasn’t so I scoff the bun, take my medicine and try to jump on a packed subway car. For some reason, everybody decided to take this particular train and it was too packed, what with my large body, a laptop and a Harry Potter book. So I waited for the next train.

8:12am : The next train came and there was only cramped standing room as everyone packed in after me. Just when I thought it was impossible to fit any more people on, another three people decided that it was worth trying and they squeezed in as the doors closed. Being touched by four different people simultaneously, I decided to make the best of a bad situation and read Harry Potter, resisting the temptation to rest the book on someone’s nearby head.

9:13am : Finally got off the train, which thankfully had emptied out enough to grab a seat for the last few stops. It was too late for my hearty breakfast at a local cafe, but I stopped there anyway for a coffee to go, feeling like I really needed one to get my body into the right gear.

9:25am : Entered the school that I’m doing a brief stint at and hurried to meet all of my new students. Last week I had taught the oldest there, who were 8 years old and had reasonable English skills. This week I would be teaching the youngest. As I found out, they had only just realized that there was actually a language called English and also that crayons didn’t taste quite as good as candy. Somehow I managed to get through the day. Everything that I said pretty much had no effect and I resorted to coloring to get me through the day.

3:05pm : Exited the school and caught the subway a few stations back, close to my next school. I wasn’t due to start for a couple of hours, so I went to a coffee shop and did some work on my writing there for a while. While doing so I installed a Windows theme which promptly made my screen completely black. I was unable to change it back because I couldn’t see anything. I resorted to Safe Mode and after an hour of fiddling, got the thing to restore back to the previous state. What a waste. It was time for my next job.

5:40pm : I wasn’t sure who what or when I would be teaching because it seems that every day something changes at this school. The only thing that I can be sure won’t change is the building, but aside from that, anything is up for grabs. I have had nice friendships with teachers there who were never seen again, lost students without a word, gained them as easily and had class times change before my very eyes. All without so much as a heads-up. But I’m not working enough hours to care too much.

9:15pm : I finished my two classes and ate dinner at the school, then caught a bus back to the subway. I caught it back to where I had entered it 14 hours before and walked out to get another bus to take me home. I was pleasantly surprised to see millions of little snowflakes slowly falling to the ground covering everything in a powdery white blanket. I walked out and looked up at the sky for a while, feeling them fall on me before I caught my bus and went home.

10:45pm : On my way home, went along to a friend’s place who told me he was moving out. I check out his place, and it was actually dirtier than mine which was surprising because I didn’t think that was easily possible.

11:13pm : After dumping my laptop at home, I decided to go out and take some photos of the snow. I kicked trees, made snow fall on me and generally had a good time until my battery ran out. On my way home at12:15am I walked past an internet cafe decided to fix the thing that had been bothering me with my website. There was an error displaying my blogs by month and year. I fixed it relatively quickly, and feeling quite tired now, headed home.

2:30am : Tossed and turned, thinking too much. It was annoying me that I couldn’t sleep, so I turned on an audio book of Isaac Asimov’s science fiction stories. Five minutes later, I was asleep.

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Creators or Destroyers


2006
01.08

In life, we either create value or destroy it. Sometimes we are so caught up in details that we miss the simple truths. Sometimes there are a thousand shades of grey, questionable deeds deeds done for noble-sounding causes, and a whole range of excuses and crutches. But when all is said and done, did you create something or destroy something?

‘Something’ can be money, or an idea. It can be somebody’s feelings or it can be a project you’re working on. Did you add value or let it stagnate and die. What I’m saying is, if it was your job to water a plant and you messed around digging, then odds are, you didn’t create anything except a hole. If you used the water on something else, then you destroyed.

Let me explain with some examples.

So you’re working on a project and you decide that you might get a promotion if you make your manager look bad… you’re a value destroyer.

Maybe you are an average worker who brings home a paycheck every fortnight. You pay your bills and save a little… You’re a value creator.

If your habit is to regularly put other people down… You are attacking their feelings and essentially destroying value.

If you accept handouts when you are fully capable of working… You’re consuming someone else’s hard-earned value which they worked for. In other words, you’re playing the role of destroyer.

Of course people can be both creators and destroyers at the same time, and most are. At the end of the day, the balances can be checked and weighed and it can be decided, but don’t worry. Nobody’s here to check or judge. Because on the whole, living a life of destruction is it’s own worst sentence. Attackers have a terrible time and their apparent victories are fleeting and momentary.

Worse than that, attacking and destroying devastates a person’s self-esteem. Nobody feels like a winner after tearing something down, be it an idea, writing graffiti on a wall or cashing that welfare check. Sure, at the time it was fun, but you don’t get any pride from doing it. As you insult and bring someone down, actually your own feeling are sinking further down. As you drag your heels at work, you start to form a resentment of those who don’t. As you despoil, steal and cheat, your own self-worth drops lower and lower. We all know in the end, you reap what you sow. But if you don’t sow anything and just reap, well you’re going to end up pretty grim. No joke.

We are all given to destruction from time to time. This fact is especially true when we are growing up. I myself, during my university years, from time to time I received a government handout to put food on my table, as opposed to getting a part-time job. Even after I finished, I got welfare while I didn’t have a job. Yet when I think back at the happiest times of my life it wasn’t getting something for nothing. I remember instead my first year at university, working an 11pm-3am shift at Safeway and bringing home my own money. Yes, I was tired and yes, it was hard combining it with uni, but it was my money. I was paying my own way and I felt independent for the first time in my life. It’s always these periods of industriousness that resonate with me proudly and the months of unearned cheques which I feel rather ashamed of.

And I guess most people are the same. Assuming you don’t go out of your way to break laws and lie, cheat and steal your way through life. And assuming you’re not the head of a huge self-made corporation, giving jobs to hundreds or thousands. Most likely you fall in the category of “average shmoe doing what they gotta do to make it”. You’re getting by, maybe even doing well, but your life is a mixture. Most of the time you earn your paycheck and don’t ask for handouts, but sometimes you’ll throw an insult someone else’s way, or you will ignore someone who obviously needs help because you’re late. You’re doing what you gotta do but no more. As for the few bad things, well everyone has vices.

That pretty much summarizes most of us. But the surprising thing is that when you go out of your way to really add value to something, to go the extra mile in relationships, in the professional world or at home, you will notice the big difference it makes. When you concentrate on what is valuable to the task at hand and seek to improve on it, the world opens up in ways you didn’t imagine.

We eat, sleep and survive based on someone’s hard work. A great many wonderful people have passed before us, laid the bricks and devised wonderful inventions and machines. The value they gave us is immense and we owe them so much. From the dawn of time, our survival has been based on the success to which we created and built. Nothing has magically changed since we got nice cars and computers. We still have the same requirements, just a different way of achieving them.

My advice: observe your words, actions and behavior with a critical eye. Did you add, detract or no nothing? Therein lies the answer to your troubles.

I just discovered a really beautiful love song. It’s by Ben Folds, called ‘The Luckiest’. I put it in my music list so get the tissues and have a listen.

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The Early Morning People


2006
01.02

For all it’s beauty, the morning is really not for me. Whenever I wake up before the day breaks, or even shortly after it does I am filled with dread. Dread at opening my eyes, dread at standing upright, dread at leaving my peaceful slumber. It passes, but so great is the feeling that I am always worried of the days I have to wake up early.

Get enough sleep I hear you say. Yes, tried that one. But even if it were easily possible for me to fall asleep at the right time, I still awake to the feeling that the world is pushing down on my chest and my life is being sucked out of me. The only natural reaction when faced with such a situation is to roll over and sleep some more.

Once up however, with some food in my belly and possibly a spray of hot water over my face and body, I’m ready for anything. Coffee helps also. Once I get going, I’m hard to stop. In fact, at the end of the day I’m doing whatever I can to delay, repress or fight off sleep. “Oh I wanna watch three hours of TV” or “it’s about time I did something on my website” or “look at that interesting piece of fluff on my floor”. As the morning hours pass, I just want to keep experiencing it.

Alarms don’t help at all, in fact most of the time they increase the unpleasantness of the ordeal. There you are, enjoying a nice dream with a good storyline and suddenly you are ripped from it by a jarring sound emanating from some object near your head. There is always a few seconds while you figure out what is making the sound and when you realize that it’s to be ignored, it’s just too late. You’re awake and you can’t get back. You feel like a premature baby snatched from the womb and forced to deal with the world. What would be far better is a chemical which stimulates the brain subtly. It would consist of tiny particles blown around in the air which, when inhaled, would make the brain simply rouse from slumber and set your metabolism back to normal levels.

Morning people amaze me. Those that rise with the same intent that I have at night, a fresh feeling and complete lack of fatigue really must thrive. After all, there are so many things you can do in the morning. You have the world to yourself, bank queues are shorter, buses less packed and shops and cafe with fresh displays and assortments, ripe for the picking. Contrast that to late at night, where the only assortment you’re likely to get is the choice of which hot dog is less hairy at 7-11.

For the next two weeks, I will live the life of a morning person. I rise at 6:30 and (try to) sleep at 12. Deep down I know that I’m just a night guy masquerading as a morning guy, but maybe everyone will be fooled. With enough coffee and mid-mid-morning snacks, the world will be mine for the taking too.

But just for two weeks.

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The Beast


2006
01.02

I slipped away in the cool of night
Away from all the light so bright
Shimmy down stairs climb down there
You lay dead and I just don’t care

I’m away
I’m away
I don’t stay
I don’t stay
I am gray
I am gray
You will pay
You will pay

Life flushed from your eyes so fast
Delicate existence couldn’t last
Lollipop candy taste so sweet
Second in line to human meat

Run away
Run away
Every day
Every day
In my way
In my way
I will slay
I will slay

Shadow helps no man to see
Fears will rush to swallow thee
Lightning stikes the helpless tree
Say your prayers and wait for me

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